Survey conducted by the All India Institute of Speech and Hearing, Mysore, finds parentsresort to at least 75 forms of psychological coercion tactics to get their children toimprove. Researchers say these tactics invariably have a negative impact on the child
Rajesh (name changed) is a slow learner and often gets bullied at school. His parents are neither compassionate nor encouraging. The 10-year-old is often made fun of, compared to his topper friends and is always under psychological pressure. His parents, who regularly threaten to send him away to a residential school, hesitate to take him along for family gatherings and have set stiff deadlines for him to improve his grades.
Only when Rajesh's parents took him to the department of clinical psychology of the well-known All India Institute of Speech and Hearing (AIISH), Mysore, did they realise that their son had a learning disability and needed help. AIISH handles children with special needs and academic problems like those suffering from autism spectrum, below-average intelligence, slow learners and the mentally challenged.
In a study on pressure tactics parents employ, the institute found that parents used a mind-numbing 75 forms of psychological coercion tactics. It ranged from withholding affection, antagonising, frightening, dictating terms, comparing them with peers, joking, secluding them by sending them to residential schools and disallowing participation in social events. The researchers say these tactics only had a negative impact on their wards.
The study was conducted on 135 children referred to the institute and the team was led by Dr S Venkatesan, professor and head, department of clinical psychology. The results were published in the International Journal of Psychology and Psychiatry in April 2014.
IN-DEPTH INTERVIEWS
A sample of 137 parents of the children, including 72 fathers (aged between 25 and 54 years) and 65 mothers (19-44 age bracket) were also part of the study. The children, all with academic problems, comprised boys aged between four and 14 years and girls aged between three and 15 years.
Following case histories, individual clinical observation and psychological testing for intelligence and academic achievement, every case was subjected to in-depth parent interviews and behaviour mapping to explore problems in child rearing practices, the situation at home, disciplinary practices followed, etc.
"The initial outcome was that we listed 75 forms of reported pressure tactics from parent respondents," Dr Venkatesan said.
"The counselors also conducted small group probes supported with confessions by the affected children. The responses were recorded verbatim before compiling them into categories."
Researchers found that the most-frequently used parental pressure tactic is psychological — the top-ranked one was lectures or sermons, followed by withholding affection, monitoring time and activities' of their children, bullying, embarrassing, persistently nagging, intimidating, emotionally blackmailing, dictating terms, comparing with better-performing peers, joking, segregating, sending to residential school, ejecting from the home, keeping mum or remaining unresponsive and disallowing participation in social events.
URBAN EDUCATED
"In some stray cases, parents also told us that they heard that other parents punish their children by locking the child in a room, denying them goodies or a vacation," Dr Venkatesan said. "Physical tactics were also used on children such as insisting on writing impositions, spanking, tying or restricting movements, pinching and branding practices that directly infringe on the primary safety of such children. It was shocking to know that a majority of the parent respondents are urbanites and educated professionals."
This apart, the parents also mentioned the need for several forms of coercion such as eating or abstaining from specific foods, wearing or not wearing certain clothes, maintaining particular hair styles, sleeping at certain places or at particular times, using television, radio or the Internet, viewing certain sites on the web, answering the phone, reading certain things, leaving or not leaving the house, maintaining cleanliness of surroundings, personal hygiene or a certain weight, etc.
HOW CHILDREN RETALIATE
In retaliation to psychological pressure tactics, Swetha (name changed), 12, an autistic child, began behaving violently with her parents. She threw things at them, became an introvert, preferred to be alone and hated school. These are some of the mechanisms children use to cope, their parents said. The study highlighted resisting, defying, being negative, rebelling, hitting,throwing tantrums, blaming others, bossing or bullying, buttering, apple-polishing, withdrawing, lying, deceiving, crying, being fearful or submissive, cheating, getting sick as some of the responses of the children.
WAY FORWARD
Although the study suggests that only a few parents resort to physical coercion to get their children to improve in academics, it does ring alarm bells. Researchers say the intention of thestudy is not to castigate already beleaguered parents. Parents lack warmth, fail to reason with their children and in turn make them retaliate. Researchers instead advocate use of nonaggressive, positive parenting practices and discipline strategies for children with different needs and those with academic problems.
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